Yes, I'm a woman. With that comes emotions over load at times. Sure I can be dramatic at times and cry at the drop of a dime occasionally. But then, I have these moments when I read something, hear a story, listen to a song, or watch something on TV and I get emotional. It truly catches me off guard at times.
Last night this happened.
I read a facebook status that mentioned one of Teddy's high school friends. It didn't sound like a good status, so I told Teddy about it and he immediately contacted another friend to find out what was going on. Turns out this couple had gone in to deliver their first born last night and they had a still born. My heart sank immediately, like they were some of my best friends. Just 2 weeks ago she had posted a picture of the sonogram on FB & expressing how excited she was to meet their baby in 30 days.
I felt that lump in my throat and was having to hold back the tears while watching X-factor.
It was my turn to pray last night before bed & we knew we would pray for the family (husband/wife, grandparents etc)...but I just cried through the entire prayer. I couldn't help it. No lump any longer...just tears and tears. I was SO sad for them. SO sad.
Part of it is just the way God wired me. I've been known to cry & pray for strangers during my life. Spiritual gift of mercy that the Lord has given me. The second part I think is just the fact that we talk about having kids all the time with other married friends. And we obviously harp on the fun & exciting of starting a family. So it just felt like a punch in the gut.
But as I was reflecting on my reaction, I felt like this was God's gentle reminder (through a situation that is distant from me) that He is in control. He knows what is best. Even through some of the most painful days, He truly knows what is BEST for us. He knows what He is doing. Lastly, He can take a love one at any given moment. My hope must be FULLY grounded in Jesus Christ. Not in my husband, my family, our future kids, or my job. I say this now & hope that some day I can look back on this blog and be reminded of what He was teaching me when I wasn't experiencing hardship full blown in my life. Hardships will come. This I know.
I pray that I can be reminded of Gods character during those times. I pray that we have a community that surrounds us that can remind me of these truth if my eyes become blurred. Thank the Lord for community.
Anyways, we feel called to continue praying for them. So why don't you join us?
Pray that the Swenson's could find healing during this time. Pray for those moments when their house is silent and all they could want is a screaming baby to fill that silent void. Pray that the mommy wouldn't feel guilt. Pray for their marriage to remain strong. Pray that they would take the time to grief over their lost & truly seek the Lord during this time.
-Kelli
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