So this past week I've had a number calling me multiple times. They called me again this morning and I was actually able to answer it. I'm not a person that won't talk to random numbers, because my job creates chances to receive many random numbers.
I answered and a man ask, "Is Kelli Smith there?". I responded, "excuse me?". (it's been a while since I've heard my maiden name...kind of caught me off guard) He asked again and I said, "This is her." Then there was silence and I was confused. Next I hear a woman saying, "Can I please speak to Kelli Smith from 2421 Quinton?". (that is my old address & old name now)...I said again it was me.
She went on to explain she is with a collection agency. A WHAT?!?-my first thought. My mind was racing thinking this is a joke, how much do I owe?, Who on earth is this calling me? WHO do I owe?, is this going to ruin my credit...etc etc.
Through conversation I figured out that it's a real collection agency. I found out it was for a bill from Grace Clinic from March 24th, 2010. Yes, a year ago. I was shocked for multiple reasons. And no it hasn't hit my credit.
1) It was a year ago. I never received ANYTHING in the mail. We lived in our old apartment March-November. We should have received something by then. Nada
2) I was still under my parents insurance for the appointment because it was when we just got home from our honeymoon & I was sick. So who knows what happened? Plus, it went towards the deducible, therefore insurance covered nothing. BLAH. We still would have to pay it, but I'm just surprised nothing was sent to my parents.
3) I felt like I was being told I had ignored paying a bill. I'm very much on top of our finances/bills. But eventually understood that it really wasn't any ones fault. Grace records indicated they sent out things. I never received anything. The collection woman was just doing her job. I got over myself pretty quickly.
We owe $213.10 to Grace clinic.
What's great about all this...yes I had to keep looking for positives things from the situaiton. Is that the Lord is good and provides what you need when you need it...always. Had this phone call had happened 2 months ago we would've had to do something with our debt money & budget we had been on. But it didn't, it happened today when we are still debt free. We have money we can use to pay this. I would obviously prefer to use that money to boast our savings...but nonetheless we have the money to pay the bill. Good timing! :)
That phone call caught me WAY off guard this morning! But it was a GREAT day anyways!
-Kells
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Monday, April 25, 2011
Easter Weekend!
Friday night I ate dinner with the hubby and then spent the rest of my evening with girlfriends! We laughed, opened presents (birthday & late birthday gifts), and watched Tangled and stayed out WAY late. It was a lot of fun!
Saturday was a day spent shopping at Old Navy & Kohls. I walked away from old navy with 2 shirts, pair of earrings, and a necklace for less than $20! SCORE! Then at Kohls I had receive a free $10 card deal from there. So we went to see if I could find anything for our home. I found a cute L that was originally $20...on sale for $9.99...which I had that $10 card/cash deal. You get the picture, I got the sucka for FREE! :) I was thrilled!
In the afternoon we worked on our support letters for Campus Crusade. At this point we have sent out around 230 letters out asking for just one time gifts for our new staff training. In August we will make a second pass when we ask people to join our team monthly! The thing is we found out this past week that NST is WAYYY more expensive then what we thought. We were thinking around $6,000 we need to raise. Turns out it is definitely closer to $10,500 for 6 weeks. It pays for our tuition for our classes, conference, room and board (dorms), fees for classes etc. So yea...ALOT. But our mouths almost hit the floor. TRUST TRUST TRUST. That is what constantly went through my head last week. Or should I say the sweet Holy Spirit was teaching me over and over. I'm excited to start checking our mailbox. It will be SO much better getting to celebrate with Teddy when support starts coming in!!! :)
Saturday night Teddy cooked us a quick dinner at home & we went to our Easter service. It was wonderful!! There was a line to get into church! After we went to see the new Madea movie. We love Tyler Perry movies & especially Madea movies. We laughed and laughed...even going to bed that night I was STILL laughing at parts. It was good!
Sunday we obviously got to sleep in since we went to church the night before.It was GREAT to not really set an alarm. I cooked a green bean casserole and we headed over to my bosses home. The entire staff team got together for an Easter lunch. It was great! I just really enjoy any time spent with them! :)We played basketball in the backyard. I did terrible the first time I picked up the ball..literally made 0 our of 5 free throws. But then later we played knockout and I won!! I beat 5 guys. Yes, only one time...but I was excited! We stayed there all afternoon, then headed to another coffee shop to work on finishing our support letters. We did our marriage book that we do every Sunday night. Had great conversation because of the book. I LOVE THE BOOK. I might have talked about it before, but if you are newly married you need to read Starting you Marriage off Right by Dennis & Barbara Rainey with your spouse. GREAT GREAT GREAT! We have done 22 weeks of the book with 30 more left.
So that is a pretty boring post, but an update at least :)
-Kells
Saturday was a day spent shopping at Old Navy & Kohls. I walked away from old navy with 2 shirts, pair of earrings, and a necklace for less than $20! SCORE! Then at Kohls I had receive a free $10 card deal from there. So we went to see if I could find anything for our home. I found a cute L that was originally $20...on sale for $9.99...which I had that $10 card/cash deal. You get the picture, I got the sucka for FREE! :) I was thrilled!
In the afternoon we worked on our support letters for Campus Crusade. At this point we have sent out around 230 letters out asking for just one time gifts for our new staff training. In August we will make a second pass when we ask people to join our team monthly! The thing is we found out this past week that NST is WAYYY more expensive then what we thought. We were thinking around $6,000 we need to raise. Turns out it is definitely closer to $10,500 for 6 weeks. It pays for our tuition for our classes, conference, room and board (dorms), fees for classes etc. So yea...ALOT. But our mouths almost hit the floor. TRUST TRUST TRUST. That is what constantly went through my head last week. Or should I say the sweet Holy Spirit was teaching me over and over. I'm excited to start checking our mailbox. It will be SO much better getting to celebrate with Teddy when support starts coming in!!! :)
Saturday night Teddy cooked us a quick dinner at home & we went to our Easter service. It was wonderful!! There was a line to get into church! After we went to see the new Madea movie. We love Tyler Perry movies & especially Madea movies. We laughed and laughed...even going to bed that night I was STILL laughing at parts. It was good!
Sunday we obviously got to sleep in since we went to church the night before.It was GREAT to not really set an alarm. I cooked a green bean casserole and we headed over to my bosses home. The entire staff team got together for an Easter lunch. It was great! I just really enjoy any time spent with them! :)We played basketball in the backyard. I did terrible the first time I picked up the ball..literally made 0 our of 5 free throws. But then later we played knockout and I won!! I beat 5 guys. Yes, only one time...but I was excited! We stayed there all afternoon, then headed to another coffee shop to work on finishing our support letters. We did our marriage book that we do every Sunday night. Had great conversation because of the book. I LOVE THE BOOK. I might have talked about it before, but if you are newly married you need to read Starting you Marriage off Right by Dennis & Barbara Rainey with your spouse. GREAT GREAT GREAT! We have done 22 weeks of the book with 30 more left.
So that is a pretty boring post, but an update at least :)
-Kells
Friday, April 22, 2011
Easter Reflection #5...12 words
WALKING TO THE CROSS - 12 WORDS
Two statements…two brief sentences…a total of 12 words…but 12 words that change everything…or do they?
I am writing this at about 2:00pm central time. On Friday, at just about this time, Jesus cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mark 15:34) and then, breathing his last, he said, “It is finished” (John 19:30).
Thank God for these 12 words. Jesus had been walking in the pleasure of the Father all of his life (this is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased – Matt 3:17). But, as the sky grew dark that one Friday, Jesus felt the scorn, displeasure, indignation, anger, wrath and isolation of his Father. From all of eternity past, never once had there been the slightest breach in the unity of the Trinity. But, now, Jesus felt something he had never felt before – the Father turning his face away from the son…so that His face could be turned to us…in infinite pleasure.
And then, as the sky was at its darkest, Jesus said three final words – It is finished. Mission accomplished…Satan crushed…humanity redeemed…wrath appeased…joy available….salvation offered…heaven opened. And, not only do we now have the pleasure of God, because of his work, we can rest.
These words changed everything…they accomplished my salvation…they secured my relationship with God…they provide me peace with God…they cause God’s face to look upon me for all of eternity with pleasure.
But, do they change everything? Everything has been changed. But, is my present reality different because of these words? Because God forsook Christ, I’m now never forsaken. But, why do I wonder where He is in the midst of pain? Why is it hard to approach him after I sin…do I think he possibly has turned his back on me? Why do I sometimes think he has left me on my own to figure out this life? When things don’t go my way, why do I wonder if he still loves me…truly loves me?
Because “it is finished”, I can rest. But, why do I find myself on a treadmill of performing for acceptance…with others and with God? Why do I run to functional saviors for life and security – status, finances, neighborhood, image, ministry success, and a thousand other “saviors”?
The cross has changed everything…and the cross should change everything. It is finished.
Questions for reflection:
How have you found yourself not believing these 12 words? What “functional saviors” have you been turning to?
How would it change everything if you truly believed that God was fully pleased with you and that because of his finished work, you could rest in that pleasure?
Two statements…two brief sentences…a total of 12 words…but 12 words that change everything…or do they?
I am writing this at about 2:00pm central time. On Friday, at just about this time, Jesus cried out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mark 15:34) and then, breathing his last, he said, “It is finished” (John 19:30).
Thank God for these 12 words. Jesus had been walking in the pleasure of the Father all of his life (this is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased – Matt 3:17). But, as the sky grew dark that one Friday, Jesus felt the scorn, displeasure, indignation, anger, wrath and isolation of his Father. From all of eternity past, never once had there been the slightest breach in the unity of the Trinity. But, now, Jesus felt something he had never felt before – the Father turning his face away from the son…so that His face could be turned to us…in infinite pleasure.
And then, as the sky was at its darkest, Jesus said three final words – It is finished. Mission accomplished…Satan crushed…humanity redeemed…wrath appeased…joy available….salvation offered…heaven opened. And, not only do we now have the pleasure of God, because of his work, we can rest.
These words changed everything…they accomplished my salvation…they secured my relationship with God…they provide me peace with God…they cause God’s face to look upon me for all of eternity with pleasure.
But, do they change everything? Everything has been changed. But, is my present reality different because of these words? Because God forsook Christ, I’m now never forsaken. But, why do I wonder where He is in the midst of pain? Why is it hard to approach him after I sin…do I think he possibly has turned his back on me? Why do I sometimes think he has left me on my own to figure out this life? When things don’t go my way, why do I wonder if he still loves me…truly loves me?
Because “it is finished”, I can rest. But, why do I find myself on a treadmill of performing for acceptance…with others and with God? Why do I run to functional saviors for life and security – status, finances, neighborhood, image, ministry success, and a thousand other “saviors”?
The cross has changed everything…and the cross should change everything. It is finished.
Questions for reflection:
How have you found yourself not believing these 12 words? What “functional saviors” have you been turning to?
How would it change everything if you truly believed that God was fully pleased with you and that because of his finished work, you could rest in that pleasure?
Easter Reflection #4...Thursday before
**Start with #1 first. I was late posting these!...GREAT though**
WALKING TO THE CROSS - THE NIGHT OF PASSOVER
When Jesus woke up Thursday morning, except for a possible afternoon siesta, it would be the last time he slept before his trial and execution. It was going to be a long day. The afternoon preparations would turn into an intimate evening with his disciples – but I could only imagine that the tone of this years Passover was different than the past couple of years.
The disciples could definitely sense that something was different this year. Maybe this is why, just like I revert to sarcasm in uneasy situations, the disciples again began to argue about their position in the kingdom (Luke 22:24).
But, in contrast to his disciples, rather than experiencing uncertainty and uneasiness, with every step through Thursday, Jesus was deliberately and intentionally walking straight to the cross. Don’t get me wrong, it was not a cold and calculated day. The evening was full of emotion – the genuine expression of love in washing his disciples feet (John 13:1-11); sharing this Passover with his disciples; the betrayal of a close friend of three years (Judas); the intimate conversations about the future with his disciples (John 14-16); the joy-filled prayer for his disciples (John 17); and the intense prayer in the garden (Luke 22:39-46).
But, with every step toward the cross, Jesus had two things on his mind:
These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. (John 15:11)
Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice. You will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will turn into joy. 21 When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world. 22 So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you. 23 In that day you will ask nothing of me. Truly, truly, I say to you, whatever you ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. 24 Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full. (John 16:20-24)
But now I am coming to you, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves. (John 17:13)
And:
And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed. (John 17:5)
Put together, it is as we see his glory that we experience joy. Toys, trinkets, achievements, acclaim, success, money, esteem, honor, sex, and food can’t bring the ultimate joy that Jesus longs for us to experience..the joy that comes only as we see his glory.
And, on this side of the grave, the greatest portrait of the glory of God is seen at the cross – where Divine wrath and grace meet; where judgment and mercy meet; where fierceness and kindness meet; where indignation and love meet; and where punishment and forgiveness meet.
Jesus is saying, if you want joy, look at the glory of God at the climactic event in all of history – the cross.
Questions for reflection:
What do you find yourself turning to, thinking that it will give you ultimate joy?
How does seeing the glory of God in Christ satisfy your joy-starved soul?
Why is Christ crucified the most beautiful thing you could ever look at?
WALKING TO THE CROSS - THE NIGHT OF PASSOVER
When Jesus woke up Thursday morning, except for a possible afternoon siesta, it would be the last time he slept before his trial and execution. It was going to be a long day. The afternoon preparations would turn into an intimate evening with his disciples – but I could only imagine that the tone of this years Passover was different than the past couple of years.
The disciples could definitely sense that something was different this year. Maybe this is why, just like I revert to sarcasm in uneasy situations, the disciples again began to argue about their position in the kingdom (Luke 22:24).
But, in contrast to his disciples, rather than experiencing uncertainty and uneasiness, with every step through Thursday, Jesus was deliberately and intentionally walking straight to the cross. Don’t get me wrong, it was not a cold and calculated day. The evening was full of emotion – the genuine expression of love in washing his disciples feet (John 13:1-11); sharing this Passover with his disciples; the betrayal of a close friend of three years (Judas); the intimate conversations about the future with his disciples (John 14-16); the joy-filled prayer for his disciples (John 17); and the intense prayer in the garden (Luke 22:39-46).
But, with every step toward the cross, Jesus had two things on his mind:
These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. (John 15:11)
Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice. You will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will turn into joy. 21 When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world. 22 So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you. 23 In that day you will ask nothing of me. Truly, truly, I say to you, whatever you ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. 24 Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full. (John 16:20-24)
But now I am coming to you, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves. (John 17:13)
And:
And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed. (John 17:5)
Put together, it is as we see his glory that we experience joy. Toys, trinkets, achievements, acclaim, success, money, esteem, honor, sex, and food can’t bring the ultimate joy that Jesus longs for us to experience..the joy that comes only as we see his glory.
And, on this side of the grave, the greatest portrait of the glory of God is seen at the cross – where Divine wrath and grace meet; where judgment and mercy meet; where fierceness and kindness meet; where indignation and love meet; and where punishment and forgiveness meet.
Jesus is saying, if you want joy, look at the glory of God at the climactic event in all of history – the cross.
Questions for reflection:
What do you find yourself turning to, thinking that it will give you ultimate joy?
How does seeing the glory of God in Christ satisfy your joy-starved soul?
Why is Christ crucified the most beautiful thing you could ever look at?
Easter Reflection #3...THE cross 2 days away
WALKING TO THE CROSS - MATTHEW 26:1-5
Tuesday had been a long day. Everything had been building to a climax – from the accusatory questions from the Religious elite to Jesus’ forceful and direct declaration of “woes” upon the Jewish people to the lengthy discourse with his disciples about His eventual, yet certain, return.
As a result, Wednesday was a day of rest for Jesus and his disciples. But, it wasn’t a day at the beach or a day on facebook catching up with friends. We know there was one thing on his mind – because we only have one thing recorded coming from his mouth that day – “You know that after two days the Passover is coming, and the Son of Man will be delivered up to be crucified” (Matthew 26:2). Jesus would spend tomorrow preparing for the Passover. Today Jesus spent the day preparing his soul for the fact that He was the main character (or THE sacrificial lamb) in this Passover.
The Divine Son who had been a part of planning this event with the Father before time began, was now also a human son who was only hours away from being murdered. We know from what will happen tomorrow night in the Garden, that this was not met without incredible anxiety and pressure.
And so, Jesus spent Wednesday preparing. Very possibly there weren’t many words spoken. There could have been many hours of awkward silence – as Jesus sat praying, alone with His thoughts. All the while the disciples were staring at one another in awkward uneasiness – not having a clue what this Passover would be about. And, all the while “the chief priests and the elders of the people gathered in the palace of the high priest, whose name was Caiaphas, and plotted together in order to arrest Jesus by stealth and kill him” (Matthew 26:3-4)
.As the hours went by, Jesus very possibly found Himself thinking:
He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth. (Isaiah 53:7)
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? All who see me mock me; they make mouths at me; they wag their heads; “He trusts in the Lord; let him deliver him; let him rescue him, for he delights in him!” I can count all my bones— they stare and gloat over me; they divide my garments among them, and for my clothing they cast lots. (Psalm 22:1, 7-8, 17-18)
Or, maybe with a smile on his face he thought, “I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel.” (Genesis 3:15)
But, as he looked at his disciples, and as he thought about you and me, he continued to come back to one thought: Surely [I have] borne [their] griefs and carried [their] sorrows; yet [they] esteemed [me] stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But [I] was wounded for [their] transgressions; [I] was crushed for [their] iniquities; upon [me] was the chastisement that brought [them] peace, and with [my] stripes [they] are healed. All [of them] like sheep have gone astray; [all of them] have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on [me] the iniquity of [them] all. (Isaiah 53:4-6)
In 2 days, our sorrows get lifted...he gets smitten, afflicted, wounded, crushed and beaten.
The cross is only 2 days away! But, for the first time this week I pause to say that…because I am reminded that He died…He died...yet for me.
Tuesday had been a long day. Everything had been building to a climax – from the accusatory questions from the Religious elite to Jesus’ forceful and direct declaration of “woes” upon the Jewish people to the lengthy discourse with his disciples about His eventual, yet certain, return.
As a result, Wednesday was a day of rest for Jesus and his disciples. But, it wasn’t a day at the beach or a day on facebook catching up with friends. We know there was one thing on his mind – because we only have one thing recorded coming from his mouth that day – “You know that after two days the Passover is coming, and the Son of Man will be delivered up to be crucified” (Matthew 26:2). Jesus would spend tomorrow preparing for the Passover. Today Jesus spent the day preparing his soul for the fact that He was the main character (or THE sacrificial lamb) in this Passover.
The Divine Son who had been a part of planning this event with the Father before time began, was now also a human son who was only hours away from being murdered. We know from what will happen tomorrow night in the Garden, that this was not met without incredible anxiety and pressure.
And so, Jesus spent Wednesday preparing. Very possibly there weren’t many words spoken. There could have been many hours of awkward silence – as Jesus sat praying, alone with His thoughts. All the while the disciples were staring at one another in awkward uneasiness – not having a clue what this Passover would be about. And, all the while “the chief priests and the elders of the people gathered in the palace of the high priest, whose name was Caiaphas, and plotted together in order to arrest Jesus by stealth and kill him” (Matthew 26:3-4)
.As the hours went by, Jesus very possibly found Himself thinking:
He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth; like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth. (Isaiah 53:7)
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, from the words of my groaning? All who see me mock me; they make mouths at me; they wag their heads; “He trusts in the Lord; let him deliver him; let him rescue him, for he delights in him!” I can count all my bones— they stare and gloat over me; they divide my garments among them, and for my clothing they cast lots. (Psalm 22:1, 7-8, 17-18)
Or, maybe with a smile on his face he thought, “I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel.” (Genesis 3:15)
But, as he looked at his disciples, and as he thought about you and me, he continued to come back to one thought: Surely [I have] borne [their] griefs and carried [their] sorrows; yet [they] esteemed [me] stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted. But [I] was wounded for [their] transgressions; [I] was crushed for [their] iniquities; upon [me] was the chastisement that brought [them] peace, and with [my] stripes [they] are healed. All [of them] like sheep have gone astray; [all of them] have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on [me] the iniquity of [them] all. (Isaiah 53:4-6)
In 2 days, our sorrows get lifted...he gets smitten, afflicted, wounded, crushed and beaten.
The cross is only 2 days away! But, for the first time this week I pause to say that…because I am reminded that He died…He died...yet for me.
Easter Reflection #2
#2
WALKING TO THE CROSS - MARK 11:20-13:37
At the core of each of us is, as Calvin would say, a factory that never tires of producing in us idols of every kind – gods of this world that promise life, but never ultimately deliver. At the center of this factory stands one idol head and shoulders above the others. On one hand, it is the most beautiful, ornate, elaborate, and impressive figure of all. But, on the other hand, it is so much a part of our idol factory that it gets lost in its ordinariness. In fact, we forget it’s there until it is challenged.
As Jesus enters into the Temple on Tuesday, if there was one thing that was true, it was the fact that the religious leaders of the day were having their idol of authority challenged. In fact, their authority was so acutely challenged that they sought to challenge the authority of Jesus – “By what authority are you doing these things…” (Mark 11:28). And so, in order to regain authority, the questions are fired at Jesus – “Is it lawful to pay taxes to Caesar, or not?” (Mark 12:14). “In the resurrection, when they rise again, whose wife will she be?”(Mark 12:23). “Which is the most important commandment of all?” (Mark 12:28) – questions meant to “test”, “entangle”, and ultimately to destroy the one who challenged to destroy their idol of authority.
Would I not have been in the same religious crowd, attacking the one who was dead set on attacking the idols of my heart? If I had given my life to climb the ladder of religious elitism and gained the reputation, acclaim, prestige, honor, and authority of a Pharisee, believe me, I would have been angry – angry at this uneducated peasant from Nazareth. He didn’t climb the ladders that I climbed. He was poor. He had a ragamuffin band of followers. But, what would have made me most angry was that he challenged to undo everything that I had been spending my life building – my reputation, honor, prestige, control and authority.
And so, I am left with two options. One, I hate the one who challenges my most sacred idols. I can deny him the ultimate authority, and therefore leave my authority in tact.
Or, in brokenness, I concede. I bow in humility, laying my most sacred idol at the cross, allowing it to be crushed by the one who gave up his authority and “became obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”
Thank God that the cross is only 3 days away. My idol that seeks to fight for ultimate and sovereign authority has to be forgiven and crushed.
Questions for reflection:
Iaian Duguid says, “the pain of an unsatisfied idolatry often serves as the messenger of God to reveal the hidden recesses of our hearts to us. As long as we get what we want and our idol is smiling upon us, it is easy for us to be oblivious to the power our idol has gained over us.” In light of this quote, what “unsatisfied” idols has God been uncovering in your heart?
How has authority been an idol in your life? And, how has it kept you from God?
Just like the Pharisees, we oftentimes unconsciously view God as a useful means to gaining what is most important to us in this life. In what way has God not been your highest goal? How have you been using him to feed your idols of recognition, praise, honor, success, comfort, etc…?
How does the cross shatter your idol factory?
WALKING TO THE CROSS - MARK 11:20-13:37
At the core of each of us is, as Calvin would say, a factory that never tires of producing in us idols of every kind – gods of this world that promise life, but never ultimately deliver. At the center of this factory stands one idol head and shoulders above the others. On one hand, it is the most beautiful, ornate, elaborate, and impressive figure of all. But, on the other hand, it is so much a part of our idol factory that it gets lost in its ordinariness. In fact, we forget it’s there until it is challenged.
As Jesus enters into the Temple on Tuesday, if there was one thing that was true, it was the fact that the religious leaders of the day were having their idol of authority challenged. In fact, their authority was so acutely challenged that they sought to challenge the authority of Jesus – “By what authority are you doing these things…” (Mark 11:28). And so, in order to regain authority, the questions are fired at Jesus – “Is it lawful to pay taxes to Caesar, or not?” (Mark 12:14). “In the resurrection, when they rise again, whose wife will she be?”(Mark 12:23). “Which is the most important commandment of all?” (Mark 12:28) – questions meant to “test”, “entangle”, and ultimately to destroy the one who challenged to destroy their idol of authority.
Would I not have been in the same religious crowd, attacking the one who was dead set on attacking the idols of my heart? If I had given my life to climb the ladder of religious elitism and gained the reputation, acclaim, prestige, honor, and authority of a Pharisee, believe me, I would have been angry – angry at this uneducated peasant from Nazareth. He didn’t climb the ladders that I climbed. He was poor. He had a ragamuffin band of followers. But, what would have made me most angry was that he challenged to undo everything that I had been spending my life building – my reputation, honor, prestige, control and authority.
And so, I am left with two options. One, I hate the one who challenges my most sacred idols. I can deny him the ultimate authority, and therefore leave my authority in tact.
Or, in brokenness, I concede. I bow in humility, laying my most sacred idol at the cross, allowing it to be crushed by the one who gave up his authority and “became obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”
Thank God that the cross is only 3 days away. My idol that seeks to fight for ultimate and sovereign authority has to be forgiven and crushed.
Questions for reflection:
Iaian Duguid says, “the pain of an unsatisfied idolatry often serves as the messenger of God to reveal the hidden recesses of our hearts to us. As long as we get what we want and our idol is smiling upon us, it is easy for us to be oblivious to the power our idol has gained over us.” In light of this quote, what “unsatisfied” idols has God been uncovering in your heart?
How has authority been an idol in your life? And, how has it kept you from God?
Just like the Pharisees, we oftentimes unconsciously view God as a useful means to gaining what is most important to us in this life. In what way has God not been your highest goal? How have you been using him to feed your idols of recognition, praise, honor, success, comfort, etc…?
How does the cross shatter your idol factory?
Easter Reflection #1...start with this one
WALKING TO THE CROSS - MARK 11:12-19
It wasn’t a “chip on the shoulder Jesus” who was experiencing stress from knowing that he would be murdered within a week. Rather, it was a Jesus who understood the seriousness of hypocrisy, heaven and hell, true worship, and the glory of God.
On Monday leading to Good Friday, the shadow of the cross was looming large. Even though the crowd was exuberant as He entered Jerusalem the day before, Jesus knew the fickleness of the human heart and that the cheers would turn to condemning accusations only within days.
But, even though hatred, rejection, abandonment, and death were looming, Jesus’ actions on Monday didn’t have a taint of anxiety or revenge. Instead, the lamb-like Jesus was giving us a glimpse into His lion-like righteousness, justice, wrath, and fierce love for the purity of true worship and the glory of God.
As he entered into Jerusalem on Monday, the religious landscape looked good from a distance (“the fig tree was in leaf”). But, upon a closer look, it was barren. And, entering the temple, Jesus moved from looking at the landscape to stepping into the heart of the religious.
What we can know from this passage is that hearts of dependence (prayer) were replaced with hearts of independence and indifference toward the supremacy of God; the glory of God was replaced with greed; a god-honoring interaction with the nations was replaced with a god-belittling embarrassment; and a longing for the true Messiah was replaced with a hatred for one who didn’t meet their expectations.
And so I find myself – more easily identifying with the independent, greedy and god-belittling hearts of the religious leaders of Jesus’ day - a heart that has deep-rooted expectations of what my Messiah should be like. And, when he doesn’t answer my prayers fast enough, or doesn’t make life comfortable for me (as I define comfort), or doesn’t give me ministry success, or takes me through his strong hand of discipline, then instead of truly worshiping and bearing fruit that lasts, what comes from my life exposes a heart that’s not aligned with the purity of Christ.
But, thank God that the cross is only 4 days away. I am just as desperate for the cross as the religious leaders of Jesus’ day. Only at the cross can I find cleansing forgiveness for this wicked heart. And, it is only at the cross that the power of my sin is broken. The wrath that withers fig trees and turns over tables was poured out on Christ so that I don’t have to bear the weight of God’s overwhelming condemnation for all of eternity. Thank God for Friday.
Questions for reflection:
In what ways have you replaced true fruit with just leaves (religious-looking outward performance)? In other words, “if people were to look at the landscape of my life, it would look good. But, if they got closer, they would see…”
Where do you find your heart most identifying with the religious leaders of Jesus’ day (independence, greed, god-belittling actions, wrong expectations leading to indifference or anger toward God)?
How can you believe the gospel more deeply to root out this sin your life?
It wasn’t a “chip on the shoulder Jesus” who was experiencing stress from knowing that he would be murdered within a week. Rather, it was a Jesus who understood the seriousness of hypocrisy, heaven and hell, true worship, and the glory of God.
On Monday leading to Good Friday, the shadow of the cross was looming large. Even though the crowd was exuberant as He entered Jerusalem the day before, Jesus knew the fickleness of the human heart and that the cheers would turn to condemning accusations only within days.
But, even though hatred, rejection, abandonment, and death were looming, Jesus’ actions on Monday didn’t have a taint of anxiety or revenge. Instead, the lamb-like Jesus was giving us a glimpse into His lion-like righteousness, justice, wrath, and fierce love for the purity of true worship and the glory of God.
As he entered into Jerusalem on Monday, the religious landscape looked good from a distance (“the fig tree was in leaf”). But, upon a closer look, it was barren. And, entering the temple, Jesus moved from looking at the landscape to stepping into the heart of the religious.
What we can know from this passage is that hearts of dependence (prayer) were replaced with hearts of independence and indifference toward the supremacy of God; the glory of God was replaced with greed; a god-honoring interaction with the nations was replaced with a god-belittling embarrassment; and a longing for the true Messiah was replaced with a hatred for one who didn’t meet their expectations.
And so I find myself – more easily identifying with the independent, greedy and god-belittling hearts of the religious leaders of Jesus’ day - a heart that has deep-rooted expectations of what my Messiah should be like. And, when he doesn’t answer my prayers fast enough, or doesn’t make life comfortable for me (as I define comfort), or doesn’t give me ministry success, or takes me through his strong hand of discipline, then instead of truly worshiping and bearing fruit that lasts, what comes from my life exposes a heart that’s not aligned with the purity of Christ.
But, thank God that the cross is only 4 days away. I am just as desperate for the cross as the religious leaders of Jesus’ day. Only at the cross can I find cleansing forgiveness for this wicked heart. And, it is only at the cross that the power of my sin is broken. The wrath that withers fig trees and turns over tables was poured out on Christ so that I don’t have to bear the weight of God’s overwhelming condemnation for all of eternity. Thank God for Friday.
Questions for reflection:
In what ways have you replaced true fruit with just leaves (religious-looking outward performance)? In other words, “if people were to look at the landscape of my life, it would look good. But, if they got closer, they would see…”
Where do you find your heart most identifying with the religious leaders of Jesus’ day (independence, greed, god-belittling actions, wrong expectations leading to indifference or anger toward God)?
How can you believe the gospel more deeply to root out this sin your life?
Monday, April 11, 2011
adobo!
Last week I found a recipe that called for Adobo seasoning. I had NEVER heard of that before. But no surprise there, I'm a newbie when it comes to cooking. I looked "everywhere" (walmart & sunharvest) and found it at Sun Harvest! It wasn't with the regular seasonings...more near the mexican food stuff. I was thrilled to find it & it was only $1.99ish for a pretty hefty jar.
I wasn't able to make the recipe last week. But we did use it to season some steaks we grilled out at a birthday party & I loved it! :)
Tonight I'm finally making Chicken & Broccoli Parmesan for dinner! It is from the website I blogged about recently...eat better america! I'm excited to try another recipe & try adobo seasoning AGAIN! (good for chicken, steak, fish etc!)
I will let you know the outcome!
-Kells
Sunday, April 10, 2011
sucked me right in...
I'm sure most of you have heard of the book Same Kind of Different as Me! I didn't know this book existed until 2 1/2 weeks ago. A friend at my lifehouse owned in & let another girl in our group borrow it. When she brought it back to her both of them were raving about it & said I needed to read it.
I walked away that night with the book in hand.
I picked it up to start reading on March 31st and finished this past Saturday morning. It sucked me in IMMEDIATELY! I'm not a big reader, so this is HUGE that I finished it. I LOVED IT! I didn't want to put it down. And I would say that it would be easy for someone who reads fast to finish this book in 2 days. I was just busy & didn't pick it up multiple days! I stayed up way to late reading it at times. I wanted to be anti-social so I could read my book. I cried & cried reading it. LOVED it.
It made my heart warm to those I love. It made me want to step outside my world and take the risk of stepping into anothers world.
I can't stop talking about it with all my friends. Saturday night Lori, Misty, and Kim walked away from our friends Ceri's house with copies in hand. Ceri had read it before too & owned all those for some reason. So now, they are going to read it. Teddy picked it up today & started reading and says it's very interesting!
If you want a good book to read, I recommend it. :)
-Kells
I walked away that night with the book in hand.
I picked it up to start reading on March 31st and finished this past Saturday morning. It sucked me in IMMEDIATELY! I'm not a big reader, so this is HUGE that I finished it. I LOVED IT! I didn't want to put it down. And I would say that it would be easy for someone who reads fast to finish this book in 2 days. I was just busy & didn't pick it up multiple days! I stayed up way to late reading it at times. I wanted to be anti-social so I could read my book. I cried & cried reading it. LOVED it.
It made my heart warm to those I love. It made me want to step outside my world and take the risk of stepping into anothers world.
I can't stop talking about it with all my friends. Saturday night Lori, Misty, and Kim walked away from our friends Ceri's house with copies in hand. Ceri had read it before too & owned all those for some reason. So now, they are going to read it. Teddy picked it up today & started reading and says it's very interesting!
If you want a good book to read, I recommend it. :)
-Kells
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
bob the builder!
So if you read my last post, you saw that we are joining staff with Campus Crusade this summer! woohoo!
In that post I said that we are starting the support raising process for Colorado. We have been "name-storming" this weekend & gathering addresses.
Last night Teddy sent a text to guy asking for his new address. 3 minutes later this "guy" was calling him. He picked it up to, “Teddy, this is Bob the builder!” in the most country accent you can possibly think of. Turns out we got the wrong number & Teddy spent the next 15 minutes on the phone with this sweet old man name Bob who really does build things.
Through the conversation we found out he is actually from Fayetteville, AR! Teddy told him all about what we are doing, explained Campus Crusade & even asked if we could send him a letter. He was spitting out scripture left and right to encourage Teddy. Random, fun thing!
I was laughing the entire time thinking WHAT ON EARTH is happening!?! We might have just roped our first “random” supporter for our team because he definitely gave us his address! If he doesn’t support financially, I know that man prays!
It was a sweet moment for us...plus great to spur us on at the beginning of this process! God is funny! :)
-Kells
In that post I said that we are starting the support raising process for Colorado. We have been "name-storming" this weekend & gathering addresses.
Last night Teddy sent a text to guy asking for his new address. 3 minutes later this "guy" was calling him. He picked it up to, “Teddy, this is Bob the builder!” in the most country accent you can possibly think of. Turns out we got the wrong number & Teddy spent the next 15 minutes on the phone with this sweet old man name Bob who really does build things.
Through the conversation we found out he is actually from Fayetteville, AR! Teddy told him all about what we are doing, explained Campus Crusade & even asked if we could send him a letter. He was spitting out scripture left and right to encourage Teddy. Random, fun thing!
I was laughing the entire time thinking WHAT ON EARTH is happening!?! We might have just roped our first “random” supporter for our team because he definitely gave us his address! If he doesn’t support financially, I know that man prays!
It was a sweet moment for us...plus great to spur us on at the beginning of this process! God is funny! :)
-Kells
Saturday, April 2, 2011
We are ACCEPTED for Campus Crusade!!
I feel like there is so much to talk about lately. I have these random thoughts and I think to myself, "I need to blog about that". But then I get here and every thing slips away.
One big thing that hasn't "slipped" my mind is a huge HUGE transition Teddy and I are about to embark on. I can't tell you how excited we are! :) I know your first thought is that we are pregnant. Every other person has thought the same thing but no, we are not.
Teddy and I have officially been accepted as full time staff with Campus Crusade for Christ!!! That's right, we will be missionaries on college campuses! To give you some background: I never thought this would be the case. We were headed towards him being a firefighter and me figuring out my job situation as the time comes. I wasn’t sure if next year I would be doing Crusade again.
Rewind a little: Spring break of 2009 we were coming back from a conference in Memphis and he mentioned he could see himself doing missions some day. I was completely surprised. Not because he didn’t love the Lord or anything, but because I always imagined him doing hard/dirty/heavy work, because of his built and his passion for those type things. But yea, that conversation didn’t go any further. It was almost just a thought in passing. Plus, we had only been dating for 7 months at that point...I threw it to the back burner!
Fast forward: My second year of interning (August 2009-2010) and Teddy and I were engaged. He had just finished EMT school & starting fire academy Fall 2009. He mentioned multiple times that he enjoys the staff team and really likes the idea of staff life. He was basically apart of the staff team this year & loved it. (mostly for social events). Towards the end of that year we got married March 2010 and his interest is growing towards ministry. Throughout my time interning, Teddy was right there with me. He was involved with the ministry and was able to get on campus here and there between him working full time at the jail. Summer 2010 occurred and I had a really hard time raising support that summer. We didn’t really ever talk about staff stuff until I finished raising support and he brought it up again. This time, for whatever reason, I knew he was for real. He really wanted us to start praying about heading that direction. WHAT?!?! It was crazy.
So August-October we prayed and prayed. Literally every night! We desperately wanted to seek God's will for our marriage! We had close friends & family praying for this time too. The first weekend of October, I finally told him yes, lets go for it! He was pretty much in very quick, I was hesitant. I had STRONG fears that made me push against the idea and had to spend many nights processing with the Lord. But yea, beginning of October we decided we were definitely going to pursue this. In November at Pine Cove (region-wide staff conference) Teddy had his first interview in person. This would normally happen at Winter Conference (January), but due to our schedules we were not going to WC.
January we started our application (a solid 30 page application for each of us) and continued praying about acceptance. Sure, Crusade is ALWAYS hiring, but they take full time ministry VERY seriously. We honestly had NO idea if we would get accepted. Therefore, we prayed and prayed again. (My prayer life has grown significantly because of this process!) We heard from Crusade the end of February saying they received all referrals (3 for me & 6 for Teddy) and would begin the process of reading our apps. We didn’t hear again until beginning of March that they were reading our applications and Teddy needed to have a phone interview. (I didn't have to have an interview, due to me being on staff the past 3 years) Teddy had his phone interview March 6th and by March 8th we had received our “pre-acceptance”. Which means, we made it past the application part and we were now onto background checks. We knew we didn’t have anything in our background that would keep us from getting the job, but still waited to share the news with the whole world. But on Friday, March 25th WE GOT OUR FINAL ACCEPTANCE! yahoooooooooooo!
What this means: Teddy and I will be in Ft. Collins, Colorado starting June 14th-July 27th (6 weeks) for New Staff Training (NST) taking seminary courses (Bible study methods/Beginning Theology/New Testament Survey), learning how to raise support (funds) together, and prepping for joining staff full time. Starting August 2011 we will start raising our funds for our salary. Typically it can take a couple 6months-1 year to raise all their support (funds). We also don’t know if we will for sure be at Texas Tech. We are confident that there is a high chance due to different conversations we’ve had with the regional people in Austin. It’s ultimately up to them and the bigger scope of our region in all 4 states. We are willing to move. If we did move it would be somewhere either in Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, or Louisiana. We will know our campus the first week we are at New Staff Training!
You might have questions and I would LOVE to answer anything.I hope you will join us in prayer starting NOW for our time with the Lord in the process, raising LOTS of $$ (now, we have to raise just for Colorado—in august we start for our salary), and our marriage through this adventure.
God's grace is completely evident throughout this entire process...all the way back to when we FIRST started dating. The Lord has so clearly been preparing us for this crazy life decision! I'm SO thrilled to be able to do full time ministry with my wonderful husband!!! :) What a blessing and ride this will be!
We love the Lord, love each other, and excited to love on college students and share Christ with them!
-Kells
One big thing that hasn't "slipped" my mind is a huge HUGE transition Teddy and I are about to embark on. I can't tell you how excited we are! :) I know your first thought is that we are pregnant. Every other person has thought the same thing but no, we are not.
Teddy and I have officially been accepted as full time staff with Campus Crusade for Christ!!! That's right, we will be missionaries on college campuses! To give you some background: I never thought this would be the case. We were headed towards him being a firefighter and me figuring out my job situation as the time comes. I wasn’t sure if next year I would be doing Crusade again.
Rewind a little: Spring break of 2009 we were coming back from a conference in Memphis and he mentioned he could see himself doing missions some day. I was completely surprised. Not because he didn’t love the Lord or anything, but because I always imagined him doing hard/dirty/heavy work, because of his built and his passion for those type things. But yea, that conversation didn’t go any further. It was almost just a thought in passing. Plus, we had only been dating for 7 months at that point...I threw it to the back burner!
Fast forward: My second year of interning (August 2009-2010) and Teddy and I were engaged. He had just finished EMT school & starting fire academy Fall 2009. He mentioned multiple times that he enjoys the staff team and really likes the idea of staff life. He was basically apart of the staff team this year & loved it. (mostly for social events). Towards the end of that year we got married March 2010 and his interest is growing towards ministry. Throughout my time interning, Teddy was right there with me. He was involved with the ministry and was able to get on campus here and there between him working full time at the jail. Summer 2010 occurred and I had a really hard time raising support that summer. We didn’t really ever talk about staff stuff until I finished raising support and he brought it up again. This time, for whatever reason, I knew he was for real. He really wanted us to start praying about heading that direction. WHAT?!?! It was crazy.
So August-October we prayed and prayed. Literally every night! We desperately wanted to seek God's will for our marriage! We had close friends & family praying for this time too. The first weekend of October, I finally told him yes, lets go for it! He was pretty much in very quick, I was hesitant. I had STRONG fears that made me push against the idea and had to spend many nights processing with the Lord. But yea, beginning of October we decided we were definitely going to pursue this. In November at Pine Cove (region-wide staff conference) Teddy had his first interview in person. This would normally happen at Winter Conference (January), but due to our schedules we were not going to WC.
January we started our application (a solid 30 page application for each of us) and continued praying about acceptance. Sure, Crusade is ALWAYS hiring, but they take full time ministry VERY seriously. We honestly had NO idea if we would get accepted. Therefore, we prayed and prayed again. (My prayer life has grown significantly because of this process!) We heard from Crusade the end of February saying they received all referrals (3 for me & 6 for Teddy) and would begin the process of reading our apps. We didn’t hear again until beginning of March that they were reading our applications and Teddy needed to have a phone interview. (I didn't have to have an interview, due to me being on staff the past 3 years) Teddy had his phone interview March 6th and by March 8th we had received our “pre-acceptance”. Which means, we made it past the application part and we were now onto background checks. We knew we didn’t have anything in our background that would keep us from getting the job, but still waited to share the news with the whole world. But on Friday, March 25th WE GOT OUR FINAL ACCEPTANCE! yahoooooooooooo!
What this means: Teddy and I will be in Ft. Collins, Colorado starting June 14th-July 27th (6 weeks) for New Staff Training (NST) taking seminary courses (Bible study methods/Beginning Theology/New Testament Survey), learning how to raise support (funds) together, and prepping for joining staff full time. Starting August 2011 we will start raising our funds for our salary. Typically it can take a couple 6months-1 year to raise all their support (funds). We also don’t know if we will for sure be at Texas Tech. We are confident that there is a high chance due to different conversations we’ve had with the regional people in Austin. It’s ultimately up to them and the bigger scope of our region in all 4 states. We are willing to move. If we did move it would be somewhere either in Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, or Louisiana. We will know our campus the first week we are at New Staff Training!
You might have questions and I would LOVE to answer anything.I hope you will join us in prayer starting NOW for our time with the Lord in the process, raising LOTS of $$ (now, we have to raise just for Colorado—in august we start for our salary), and our marriage through this adventure.
God's grace is completely evident throughout this entire process...all the way back to when we FIRST started dating. The Lord has so clearly been preparing us for this crazy life decision! I'm SO thrilled to be able to do full time ministry with my wonderful husband!!! :) What a blessing and ride this will be!
We love the Lord, love each other, and excited to love on college students and share Christ with them!
-Kells
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